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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26985712">Benign</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsdarkinhere/pseuds/itsdarkinhere'>itsdarkinhere</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Trashtober 2020 [12]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Bucky Barnes's Metal Arm, Choking, Dark Bucky Barnes, F/M, Non-Consensual Blow Jobs, Not Canon Compliant, Oral Sex, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rough Sex, Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes, bucky isn't nice, reader is hydra, reader isn't exactly nice either</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 22:48:52</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Rape/Non-Con</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,753</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26985712</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsdarkinhere/pseuds/itsdarkinhere</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>You tried not to look at him as you recited the words, but… There was something in his eyes. And for the first time since you were given the duty of resetting the Soldier, you recognized what that something was. It was the last shred of humanity that he was clinging to, and that's what gave you pause. The final words caught in your throat. But you couldn’t say them out loud, not when those wild blue eyes were staring at you so intently. Unlike your colleagues, you saw a man behind the unkempt hair, the foreboding mask, the haunted expression. </p><p>And, in that instant, he saw your hesitation.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>James "Bucky" Barnes/Reader, winter soldier/reader</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Trashtober 2020 [12]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1951207</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>58</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Benign</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>No trash randomizer for Day 12:<br/>12 | Asphyxiation | Bucky Barnes</p><p>There's only one person who deserves today and it's my man, Bucky Barnes. <br/>I know you are better than this, Buck.</p><p>Now choke me, dammit.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The words came to you easily. </p><p>You knew them by heart now, but you could never get used to the way the Soldier looked at you, with such ferocity and single-mindedness. So you tried not to look. You tried not to hear. You tried not to think that he was anything more than just a weapon. At least, that’s what your superiors had always told you. But you weren’t them. You didn’t have the resolve that they did. You didn’t rally behind the cause like they did. If anything, you were only here, in the heart of Siberia instead of cozy in the States, because of a slew of mistakes and unfortunate events in your life. </p><p>You tried not to look at him as you recited the words, but… There was something in his eyes. And for the first time since you were given the duty of resetting the Soldier, you recognized what that something was. It was the last shred of humanity that he was clinging to, and that's what gave you pause. The final words caught in your throat. </p><p><em>Freight car. Say the fucking word!</em> </p><p>But you couldn’t say them out loud, not when those wild blue eyes were staring at you so intently. Unlike your colleagues, you saw a man behind the unkempt hair, the foreboding mask, the haunted expression. </p><p>And, in that instant, <em>he</em> saw your hesitation. </p><p>With something louder than a clap of thunder the Winter Soldier ripped his titanium arm out of the heavy steel clamp that bound him to the chair. Bolts flew into the air as a frenzy rose out of the other engineers in the room. You backed away as everyone scrambled around the operations area, shouting echoed through the abandoned missile silo as your superior berated your for fucking up—but he was already halfway to the control room. You scrambled too, your heart beating so quickly it became the only thing you could hear in the ensuing chaos.</p><p>The Soldier ripped the other cuff off like a savage animal, and stood up from his seat. Any form of auxiliary restraint was met with equal resistance, and he dispatched them quickly. The guards rushed in, guns blaring, but were rag dolls compared to the Soldier’s strength. You pressed your hands to your ears and ducked down as you ran. You almost made it to the closing blast door, which led into the control room, when the body of a guard was thrown past you and clipped you in the head. You stumbled and fell onto your hands and knees, but knew you had to get back up, only to see that the doors were firmly shut. The Soldier’s loud footsteps rang out behind you and you turned just in time to see him pull off the mask and toss it aside as he made his approach. </p><p>It was all so surreal, your body was frozen. You saw the gleam of metallic before a heavy weight squeezed down on your throat. There was shouting followed by gunfire. All the while, those cold fingers held onto your neck, a silent threat; pinching hard enough to make you struggle for air, but never enough to force you over the edge and into unconsciousness. You tried to speak, but nothing came out. He tilted his head and looked at you for a long moment, recognizing you as the rest of the fog cleared from his gaze. You didn’t dare think to understand what could be going on in the Soldier’s scrambled memories, but he gripped you tightly and picked up an assault rifle, before dragging you out of the lab, into the hallway that was a circus of red siren lights. </p><p>Everything happened within seconds of each other, which meant that notice of the emergency would be just now flitting through the compound, but it was too late. The Winter Soldier could easily disappear in the amount of time it took to mobilize the Strike Team. The overhead announcement system blared commands that couldn’t be monitored as everyone ran for cover.</p><p>This was it; you lost the Asset. HYDRA will kill you, if the Winter Soldier didn't do it first. </p><p> </p><p>You didn't remember passing out, but you must have because you were woken up with a stinging slap to the face. It had enough force to snap your head to the side and you immediately felt your lip split. The taste of copper pooled onto your tongue and made you gag. You gritted your teeth and spat out blood onto the floor. Your vision slowly pieced itself together, the tightness in your throat was from the vice grip he had on you during the escape, which was no doubt swollen now—after an uncertain amount of time had passed. You knew that the bruises were forming, if they hadn’t already collared you in rings of deep red and purple. </p><p>Among the bright patches and dark patches, you saw cold blue eyes, lips pressed into a thin line, and the stern set of a strong jaw, stubble making the face look wild and brutal. </p><p>"I want answers." His voice was rough and low, most likely from disuse. "And you're going to tell me," he raised his left hand, the metal gleaming in the dim light of the warehouse you somehow ended up in. He ran the titanium fingers down the column of your neck, almost like a caress, as if surprised by how the artificial limb moved. His touch was smooth and alien and it made you shiver and jerk backwards, only to find that there was nowhere for you to go. You were strapped down in a wooden chair, very similar to the way he had always been detained. </p><p>He chuckled, brushed some hair away so that he could press his lips to your ear and whispered, "There's no escaping me." </p><p>"Plea-" before you could finish forming the word, his grip tightened on your throat again, incrementally squeezing down. </p><p>This was a warning. </p><p>"Shhhh." He hushed. "Just answer my questions, and I won't have to hurt you." He said the words, but you had a feeling he wasn't planning on honoring them. There was a frantic look in his eyes; that haunted look, of a man pushed too far, where he stopped being human and turned into a beast. "Where are we?" He asked bluntly, the heel of his palm resting against the hollow of your collarbone.</p><p>When you didn't answer immediately his fingers tighten. "Siberia." You managed to choke out. </p><p>"Shit… What year is it?" </p><p>"2014."</p><p>“Fuck.” He cursed again. You watched his eyes dart around, thinking quickly before narrowing as a grimace took over his otherwise handsome face. A man lost to time. "You're American?" </p><p>The question sounded more like an accusation coming from him, because what can you say? You were American by nationality, but HYDRA owned you. How do you tell a man, who went to war for his country, that the time of nations and borders were in the past? Power and greed knew no bounds. When you didn't respond immediately, his fingers twitched and closed in. It became hard to breathe. You struggled in your seat, eyes widening as you stared at him between your choking breaths. Warmth pooled into your chest and extremities as your body jerked about like an obscene puppet. After the longest 30 seconds of your life, he let go suddenly and you gratefully gasped for air. </p><p>"Let's try that again…" The Winter Soldier said. When your eyes focused again, you looked up and watched him drag over a stool and sat down in front of you, pushing apart your knees and getting between your legs. He was huge, his large frame dwarfing the stool as he found purchase. You realized that he was halfway out of his tac gear, but still looking incredibly intimidating. He placed his hand on your neck again, rubbed the muscle there with a mindlessness that made your heart flutter. </p><p>"I remember everything, you know that?" He growled. You didn't know when he'd tighten that grip again and the anticipation sunk deep into your chest and curled into itself, turning into some kind of shameless and dark creature. “It comes in pieces but… I’m starting to remember.” Or maybe the creature always existed and he had simply set it loose. "I'm going to make you pay for what you did to me." He said with a rabid glint in his eyes. </p><p>You stared fearfully into his blue eyes and he stared back, unflinchingly. </p><p><em>There was a man behind those eyes…</em> You thought numbly. Now there was nothing but the ire of a caged beast, finally free. "S-so kill me then…" you knew it would happen sooner or later. Working for HYDRA wasn't a job that people saw into their twilight years.</p><p>Whatever he was searching for in your gaze, he seemed to find. A wry smile turned his lips up and he pressed his metal thumb against your jugular. You were sure he could feel your stuttering pulse; that arm of his was calibrated to be just as sensitive to tactile reception as a normal hand—perhaps even more so.</p><p>"I'm not going to kill you," he retracted his touch and leaned back in his seat, the simple stool groaned under the weight of his hardened muscles. He tilted his head to the side, as if studying you with an artistic scrutiny. "You might still be of use to me." He mumbled, and you detected the rough drawl of a Brooklyn accent coming through. He's reverting. He's been out of the chair for too long. Out of the ice. And there was no way you could get in contact with HYDRA, not like this. Plus, you weren’t even certain you’d want to, they were probably furious that you were the one who freed their Asset.</p><p>You pursued your lips and swallowed, saw his eyes follow the click of your throat with intense interest. He was staring at your bruised neck and he wasn’t even hiding it. "What...What do you want me to do?" </p><p>"Well, frankly, I need information. And you're going to tell me everything." His gaze dropped as he dragged his eyes down your body. His teeth raked across his bottom lip as a scornful look crossed his face. "I'm sure you’re aware that HYDRA has ways of making people talk."</p><p>He was just as calculating as the stories said he'd be. The precision of his gaze was as sharp as the edge of a blade and spoke volumes of a man who was trained to maximize suffering. You needed to stop this, what were the words again… You had to try.</p><p>You took a deep and shuddering breath, attempted to calm your trembling voice, and began reciting. "<em>Longing. Rusted. Seventeen.</em>" You saw the Winter Soldier twitch as pain etched into his face, he snarled and got to his feet. </p><p>"What are you doing?" He sneered as his hands shot out, closing the short gap between the two of you. The stool legs clattered as he stood.</p><p>"<em>Daybreak. Furnace.</em>" You felt his hands clamp down on your throat. But the fingers twitched and stuttered and the Winter Soldier gave an involuntary jerk as he wrestled for control over the programming. </p><p>“Shut up. Shut up…” His words were venomous, but his voice was a soft, pleading whisper. </p><p>"<em>N-nine.</em>" Your airway was suddenly snapped shut as you choked out the next word. It came through as a garbled sound, effectively ending the string.</p><p>"You little bitch. You wanna play games?" The Winter Soldier asked, bringing his face down to whisper into your ear, so close that you could feel the rasp of his beard across your cheek. "I know ways to keep that mouth of yours busy." </p><p>You couldn't breathe, you opened your mouth, but you couldn't make a single sound no matter how hard you strained. He was holding down on the pressure and your face was growing warm and slack. You choked and flailed in your restraints, but he held you until the fight left you, until strength drained from you. You felt weightless and floaty when he finally pulled away and removed your bindings. You were numb, when he took you by the hair and tossed you onto the cold concrete floor. </p><p>You coughed, violently, clutching your throat; head swimming with terror and panic. You heard a zipper, looked up to see the Winter Soldier pull out his dick, which was half-hard and flushed. </p><p>"I warned you." He said. You tried to scramble away, but he caught you by the scalp and wrenched you backwards. It tore a scream from you, which only made his dick twitch. He was getting off on this. "Now, if you don't wanna give me the information I need, you can at least do this." He pushed the head of his cock past your lips, shoving himself down the root until you started choking. You gripped him by the thighs, but he didn't budge. He was too strong. You entertained the thought of biting down, as tears sprung into your eyes, but the hold he had on you was terrifying enough. </p><p>The Winter Soldier began to move, his hips violently thrusting into your face as he got himself off. Your throat was fucked raw, every time he pushed in you felt him hitting the back of your throat, bruising the muscle and making your throat spasm. You were limp in his hands and he used you as he pleased. An eternity passed and his thrusts started to stutter and lose rhythm. </p><p>"Fuck, the girls nowadays sure know how to suck cock." He grunted. </p><p>You closed your eyes, felt like you were going to pass out as pain roiled through your entire body. In the end, you didn’t pass out. You felt the Soldier’s cock slide deep into your throat, thrust after thrust, while he held your head in place. You gagged on the length and felt your lips being stretched obscenely wide, every time your throat constricted it made him groan overhead. </p><p>Tears leaked from your eyes and he gathered your hair into one large fist. “Come on, doll. A little more effort could go a long way.” He drawled, hips pumping in a steady rhythm. You wanted it to be over, but also couldn’t deny that the weight of his dick against your tongue, and the masculine scent of him, were starting to make your stomach flutter in a very perverse way. You pressed the flat of your tongue against the velvety underside and heard him groan like you’d just punched him in the gut. “Yeah, like that, baby. Now suck on it.” You did, pressing your lips around the wide girth and sucking in as he pulled out. Your jaw was sore, your throat was on fire, and you were still lightheaded, because you could barely get enough room to breathe.   </p><p>He continued to forcefully fuck into your mouth, until a shiver ran up his spine and his dick twitched in your mouth. The Soldier grunted and grabbed you by the back of the head with both hands and started to thrust in earnest. You tried to scream, but it came out as a muffled squeal that made him shiver again. He let out a string of curses as his thrusts grew more and more powerful, as he held you down longer and longer until you were mashed up against his pubic bone, twisting with a desire to get away and <em>breathe</em>. Your vision blurred and you tried to hit him or push him away, but there was no escape. Your stomach turned and your throat fluttered as the edges of your vision began to fade. Then, he gave a loud growl as he came down your throat. You felt the cum coat the inside of your mouth and choked on how thick it was. You coughed and some of it came out of your nose. </p><p>Finally, he let you go and backed away with a dark chuckle as you dry heaved, drool and cum and sweat dribbling onto the ground as you spat endlessly. </p><p>"Please... Please just kill me." You whimpered, your head throbbing and your throat on fire. </p><p>The Soldier crouched down beside you, tucked a slip of cum splattered hair behind your ear and caressed your cheek. He lifted your chin with his titanium hand, looked deeply into your eyes and said, "Oh, no. I'm just getting started, doll."</p>
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